​Quit doing what you love and love what you are doing
The worst piece of advice given is “do what you love and you will never work another day in your life.”  That is about as hokey and wrong as any advice received.  Toss it.  Burn it.  Shove the book in which you read it in the outdoor fireplace over Christmas.
Now, how can we cure that thought?  Just because we think it does not mean it is true.  It just ain’t true.  Let’s put a little cognitive behavior therapy through remodeling against that thought.
What evidence do you have that it is true?  Well, my friend told me he loves his job and it does not feel like work.  And there is this philosophy self-help book I read that was full of statistics on job satisfaction.  And I really am working hard and enjoying it less, so maybe if I changed to something else I would feel better.
What evidence do you have that is it not true?  I love what I do.  All my friends tell me they love what they do.  And none of us is really happy, content, or satisfied.  We always want more, work harder, lose out on family fun, and are generally just as depressed as a group as anyone out there without a job at all.
What would happen if you changed the thought just a little bit?  Love what you do and you enjoy your work more.  Is that more real and reasonable?  Of course.  It is more true, because it works.  Love what you do.  Quit looking over that other fence and comparing your car, home, toys, spouse, children’s accomplishments, and size of income.  Just quit iti.  Love what you do. 
Russell Cornwell built an entire university on a story.  In the story he taught one principle.  Mine the diamonds at your feet before you run off looking for a better opportunity.  Yep.  It works.
Reinhold Niebuhr unintentionally revolutionized the recovery industry by writing a prayer for a Sunday morning that we call the Serenity Prayer.  One line in particular that most don’t read is “Enjoying each moment”.  Another is “that I might be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with Him in the next.”  In other words, get about the business of living the moment you have to the max.  Love it.  Mine the diamonds at your feet.
There are millions of people saying, “If I could just make money doing what I love, I would be happy.”  It is a lie.  Don’t buy that lie.  Love what you do.  Get busy finding joy and value in the task in front of you. 
So here are two steps to love what you do even if you hate it today.

1. Set a goal to find joy in your job and integrate more of your personality into the performance.  J. C. Penny “Give me a stock clerk with a goal, and I will give you a man who will make history. Give me a man without a goal, and I will give you a stock clerk.”  Goals govern growth, but irrational, unachievable, and ill-considered goals just get you miserable.  This is about having a great Christmas vacation and heading back to the job with more vitality and vigor.
2. Look for the 25% increase.  So far, I’ve not been proven wrong on this item.  Every thing that is can be improved 25% and that includes the item I just improved.  Marriage. Parenting. Community service.  Business operations.  Hobby skills.  Golf game.  Set a goal to improve and enjoy 25% more than you are today.  Just do that and notice the increase spring in your step.

Okay, this newsletter is about RESILIENCY!  It is about Life Skills, Parenting Pizzazz, and Conquer Your Anger Take Back Control of Your Future.  At SOLUMCommunity.net, we are focused on fixing fractured families.  We all have a little crack in our foundation and need some tuck and pointing work done.  So let’s do it with aplomb.
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405.494.0637

COVID can be frightening.  The uncertainty haunts us.  Lost job opportunity.  Lost access to stores and restaurants.  Everything just went online.
All of this gives us a scare.
Here at SOLUM, we take the scare out. 
Immediately our team went to work creating the Empower University Pathways Online Training Center.  Just call it EUP - Empower University Pathways.
These are strutured courses to get you moving in the right direction depending on where you are today and where you want to go.  There are over five years of study in the university pathways that cover Life Skills, Anger, Parenting, Recovery, and Biblical Learning Center.  WOW... that is impressive.  And every lesson has been first taught face to face in a proven results workshop and then brought online interactive with mentoring to make it powerful for your life.  That is just great stuff.
So start with the Intro to SOLUM to decide what is best for you today.

SOLUM promotes thinking. Through studied application of cognitive restructuring, social skills, and problem resolution regimens a life can move forward. We see results daily.

In a recent study on mindfulness, it is determined that great logical thinkers like engineering students can develop better creativity also. So THINK is for all stages of economic and creative success? Yes.

How Mindfulness Can Help Engineers Solve Problems

Our January sessions start this Monday at 7pm. Take time to develop your creativity. Our average graduate increases their skills in core areas of thinking, social skills, and problem resolution by 200 to 300 percent. That is good stuff for you, your workplace and your family and friends. Anger reduces. Life is brighter. Who would not want that?

Get more information and register here. THINK! For a better life forward.

Contact me, the THINK Dr. Phil at [email protected] 940.580.4887

Beloved, I pray that all may go well with you and that you may be in good health, as it goes well with your soul.
3 John 1:2 esv

Five Habits of People Who Live Long (Warning: Diet and Exercise are Not Enough!) https://t.co/i5EY7gRqbO via @Inc

Quick summary: Live well and long? 1. Interval training exercise 2. Mediterranean diet 3. Meditation (Prayer and Bible study are the best) 4. Good relationships 5. Optimism

In all of our Life Foundations coursework, we emphasize and train in 3,4, and 5. Guess we need to add sections on 1 and 2.

I can guarantee that if you follow these you can in many instances overcome depression and anxiety, reduce anger, increase mental clarity, beat addictions. Many recovery methods are deficient in all five and emphasize behavioral modification and sometimes mindfulness (a form of meditation).

You might be recovering from a knee injury or an addiction or a bad relationship or a lost lives one or just a life of confusion. You might be just looking for a better life forward. Let us help. Contact me, Phil, and I will connect you with Life Change. [email protected]

​Cultural struggles tend to emphasize one area over another. Truthfully, many times many areas are important all at the same time. Dads are always important. Moms are always important. Grandparents are always important.

Recently, Dr. Ken Canfield, and a team bring life back to fathers.com (Fathers Are Important) and the fathering movement. It seems to have died out across the nation and become focused on the broken percentage of dads that were out of the mix. I am proud to be a part of that team and I encourage you to do your part in your home. Get in the mix. Put yourself back in the driver seat alongside the mother of your children.

Lifelong dads. Kids need ’em.

You are important. Live your role. 42% of kids have no father at home. Be one of the 58% of fathers that stay committed. 41% of children are born without a marriage. Be one of the 59% that have children in the safety and security of a committed relationship in marriage. Be the one.

Make fathering fashionable for your family.

Take a few minutes or hours and peruse the refreshed http://fathers.com. Put some holiday tips to work. Leave a donation for the team to be encouraged.

This is a tough one, right?  Anger can have a stronghold worse than any addiction.  If fact, it may be a feeder to an addiction.  Do you find yourself drinking because you want to calm the inner beast?  It happens.

Anger escalates.  It starts small and then erupts into a seething blast of inappropriate words and actions.  It can really get us into trouble, destroy relationships and lead into major depressive episodes.

It can be conquered.  You can have a better life forward.

Anger has a few roots.  One of those is your CORE VALUE.  Building your inner core value is much like an athlete developing their CORE.  We can help you with that at SOLUM.  First ask yourself some quick questions?  Go to this link to give yourself a quick assessment of where you stand in regard to anger.  BE HONEST with yourself.

IS ANGER GETTING CONTROL OF ME?

Whew, now you see some things you might not have seen.  You have good choices at SOLUM CTI.  Get into an action based solution. SOLUM Community offers a 90 break through workshop – THINK – based on research and evidence based cognitive self restructuring.  If you issue is a light anger, that is a great place to start and you will build skills for a lifetime.  This is a good place to start and it will get you moving on a decisive path. THINK Click Here for Schedule and more information.

But it might not be enough.  We have three upcoming six week workshops for men only and for women only to address Anger/Loss/Addiction that I strongly recommend.  You are not going to break anger in a minute or through any quick fix. You need to contact me now to get into one of these.  NOW. [email protected] 

Get really serious. God cares and is ready to help you through this situation. Pray with me below.  Get God on your side. Scroll down and pray with me right now. Connect with a committed accountability coach and  study through Celebrate Recovery 25 lessons.  This is discipleship based change.  Usually six months is involved.  Jeremiah 17:14  Heal me, O Lord, and I shall be healed; Save me, and I shall be saved, For You are my praise.

Disclaimer: Suggestions given here are not meant to replace professional counseling. They are meant to get you started on a journey to a better life forward.

Givers Choice:  You’ve picked up some value today for free. What about others?  Pay it forward.  Make a tax deductible donation so we can keep helping others.  PayItForward

Every week someone comes to me with this question.  They may or may not ask it outright. Recently a woman appeared at the door of our community center looking for this answer. She has four children in state custody. Her life is spinning. She is battling addiction to prescription drugs originally given for a plaguing back condition. This is common. Where do you start?

Addictions are most often tied to your emotions. Ask yourself some tough questions. What is it that drives me to choose the addictive habit or substance? What feeling or emotions tend to precede my addictive choices? Is there a frustration underlying my choices that keeps repeating? Get into an action based solution. SOLUM Community offers a 90 break through workshop – THINK – based on research and evidence based cognitive self restructuring.  You are not going to break an addiction in a minute or through any quick fix. This is a good place to start and it will get you moving on a decisive path. THINK Click Here for Schedule and more information

Get really serious. God cares and is ready to help you through this situation. Pray with me below.  Get God on your side. Scroll down and pray with me right now. Connect with a committed accountability coach and  study through Celebrate Recovery 25 lessons. This is discipleship based change. Usually six months is involved. Jeremiah 17:14  Heal me, O Lord, and I shall be healed; Save me, and I shall be saved, For You are my praise.

Disclaimer: Suggestions given here are not meant to replace professional counseling. They are meant to get you started on a journey to a better life forward.

Givers Choice: You’ve picked up some value today for free. What about others? Pay it forward. Make a tax deductible donation so we can keep helping others. PayItForward